River's Homebirth Story

December 29th 2022

40+6 weeks

3.96kgs / 8.73lbs

The day prior Mitch (my husband) and I had decided to have Amara (my eldest daughter who was 15months old at the time) sleepover at my parents, with the expectation that it would be our last night alone before River joined our family. We still thought we had a few more days to wait and were expecting her to be born sometime in the new year.

We settled into bed for the night, but around 1 am the next morning I woke up with mild cramping. I tried to ignore it and get some more sleep, reminding myself that this could be nothing and that we probably had a few more days to wait. I'd experienced cramping for 2 nights the week before Christmas but nothing had come from it, so I wasn't getting my hopes up. I drifted in and out of sleep in between the cramps that came about every 15-30min. At 3 am things were unchanged in length or intensity so I woke Mitch up and we decided to try bouncing on the birth ball to get things to progress. We put on a movie (Juno), and I bounced away.

Around 6 am I told Mitch that I didn't think she would be born today as my cramping was still the same as it was when it first woke me. We decided to text our midwife Sunny anyway and joked with her that River would be born on the 30th, the only day that week that Sunny had plans. Mitch made breakfast and after we had eaten we timed a couple of contractions, which to our surprise were about 5-10min apart but only lasting 30 seconds, and were not very intense. I put on the TENS machine for a distraction and we began playing connect 4. After only 2 rounds I'd lost concentration and we put it aside. I messaged my family to let them know we wouldn't be picking Amara up that morning and asked them to arrange for her to sleep over another night, still thinking River wouldn't come until the next day but expecting to need the rest that coming night.

My sister phoned around 9 am with the offer of dropping off coffee, we invited her in and she stayed for a short chat. At this point, my contractions were quite intense and I was having to breathe and concentrate through them but was still very much in denial that it was happening today, making jokes about the situation. My sister left and Mitch encouraged me to get in contact with Sunny again. Knowing she was attending another appointment that morning and would be done around 11 am I insisted that we didn't bother until she would be finished.

After having the TENS on for a few hours I decided to take a break from it and try a shower for relief. We had a shower stool that I sat on while the water ran over my back. The water and warmth felt relaxing but sitting made my contractions so much stronger and by the time I got out of the shower, I had decided that maybe I was actually in labour. We timed a few more contractions, and they were now coming every couple of minutes and lasting at least a full minute each, 'head to the hospital immediately' the timing app suggested. We weren't doing that, we had planned a home birth and our birth space was ready for us. While I waited for Mitch to get some clothes organised and help me get dressed I could no longer stand through contractions so I knelt over the birth ball on our bed and rocked back and forwards. Sunny phoned and Mitch answered, her appointment was finished and she asked if she should head over, I just nodded. I thought she would pop in and check over bub and I before heading off again and returning later when things were more established. I don't know what I was waiting for, things were pretty full on at that point.

Sunny arrived around 11:30 am and after a quick assessment, she began filling the birth pool and contacted our second midwife, Kate. I was unaware at the time, but I had a dark purple line on my bottom, an indication that I was further progressed in labour than I thought, we didn't do any cervical checks so this was a handy observation. I laboured on our bed with the birth ball, while Mitch held my hands and helped regulate my breathing until the pool was ready. Unfortunately, our water pressure from the kitchen sink isn't great and the pool took a long time to fill. At 1:30 pm it was finally ready and I hopped in.

The pool offered immediate relief. I'd been kneeling for about 3 hours, so the weightlessness was nice, but I couldn't find a position that eased the contractions, only positions that made them much more intense. I was tossing and turning, alternating between being on my back, squatting, and side-lying between every couple of contractions for what felt like an eternity. At some point, Kate asked if I had had a chance to bake River's birthday cake, which I had planned to do in early labour. But because I had been too busy convincing myself I wasn't in labour I hadn't done it. Kate and Sunny whipped up the packet mix chocolate cake and put it in the oven, the smell filled the house.

Around 3:30 pm, and on the verge of tears we decided to do an examination to see where I was at, and if something was preventing River from being born. On inspection River was trying to come out forehead first, I lay down and pushed while Sunny repositioned her. Once her head was presenting at a better angle she immediately started to descend with each push.

I got back into the pool and my mindset had changed completely. I had felt like I was going to be stuck in labour forever. But once I could feel her moving down, and pushing felt productive, I knew it wouldn't be long until we got to meet her. I'd gone from whimpering through every contraction and giving Mitch 'the look' during each rest, to being able to talk and with a bit of guidance calm my breathing in between contractions. I was still moving around a lot and tried pushing in lots of different positions, but eventually settled with sitting in a reclined position, holding onto the pool handles while Mitch supported my legs. I could feel her moving further down during each contraction and used a mirror to see her head. Being able to feel and see her was a huge motivator and just a few really big pushes later her head was born. We were amazed at how much hair she had and with the next contraction at 4:10 pm, the rest of her body came shooting out into the water. I caught her, unwrapped her cord from around her neck, and pulled her up onto my chest. She was coated in a very thick layer of vernix and a big mop of jet-black hair. I pulled some mucus away from her nose and mouth, rubbed her back and gave her kisses but she was struggling to get that first cry out. We checked her cord was still pulsating and her heart rate was fine, but she was congested and needed help getting those first few breaths. Sunny and Kate very calmly provided a bit of suction to remove mucus from her airways and resuscitation to expand her lungs. Slowly she began taking a few independent breaths and let out a few little cries, which became more frequent until she was completely fine. At 4:30 pm I felt my placenta ready to come out and with a little push, it joined us in the water. I pulled it up and put it in a bowl floating next to us. Both disgusted and intrigued we inspected it with Sunny. 10min later the pool had cooled down and I was ready to get out. Mitch cut and tied the cord using a special cord tie Sunny had crocheted for us. I showered and Mitch enjoyed some skin-to-skin with River. He walked her around the house showing her her new home.

After my shower Sunny and Kate helped get me dressed and tucked the 3 of us into bed while they began cleaning up. River breastfeed and we enjoyed snuggles with our newest little one while we shared the news with our immediate family. Sunny and Kate joined us in the bedroom to give River a once-over before heading off for the night. We weighed her and to everyone's surprise, she was the same birth weight as her big sister, 3.69kgs. With hugs, kisses and a big thank you, our beautiful midwives headed home around 6 pm. We stayed snuggled up for another hour until I remembered we had birthday cake and a bottle of champagne to crack.

We sat in the lounge room, mimosas, birthday cake and River in hand, and celebrated what had been one of the most amazing and empowering days of our life. By 9:30 pm we were all tucked into bed, ready to rest and wake up the next morning to begin the rest of our lives as a family of four.